Saying
"they did their best"
is as much
(if not more)
about comprehension
as it is about
compassion.
Too often
"they did their best"
is said all in one breath,
like it's one word:
theydidtheirbest!
But you know what?
Just because you
acknowledge that,
just because you
understand that hey,
theydidtheirbest
doesn't mean you can't also
stop
and acknowledge that
their best
sucked.
I don't want to live in that place
but I don't want to blast
past it,
either.
They did their best means
I see their limitations.
I see how hopelessly
unprepared or
overwhelmed or
outmatched or
unable they were.
It's not that they wouldn't do better.
They couldn't.
Through their own
warped ego or
fear induced rage
or baffled depression
they really did
do their best.
Their poor choices were driven by
their sickness
just like my poor choices were
driven by mine.
Which means that
when I say --
and understand --
they did their best
I don't have to take it personally.
It means
I'm not a victim.
Which means I can
let go
and
move on.