"We need to speak to the manager -- are you the manager?"
They were a scruffy looking couple, and depending on lighting and environment might seem like either they'd been a little beat up or they'd beat you up a little.
My boss was there, but not on duty, so I was in the hot seat. Unfortunately the place was hopping, and it felt like I wasn't carrying dishes so much as keeping a dozen of them spinning.
"Yes, I'm the manager. I'll be happy to help you in just a moment." This delivered practically on the fly as I sent one plate back to the kitchen for a fix, and shooed one of the kids back onto the floor. "Bus please" I mouthed to him, with a mock scowl. He raised his hands in surrender and skedaddled.
Mr. and Mrs. Scruffy took a seat on the little bench where people wait for their take out orders to come up.
Out of sight of the couple I caught my boss's eye and asked, in a whisper, if she knew them, or what it was about. "No clue." She shrugged. "Do you want me to..."
"No, no, I got it. Just wondering if there was background I needed."
Just a few minutes later I was able to make my way back to them. "I'm so sorry to keep you waiting. How can I help?" I asked.
"Oh, you're busy, no problem. We're from up north," the man said. "Ran into some trouble here. Out of funds. Just wondering if we could get something to eat."
This was absolutely not what I expected, but my brain thought so fast, I made a decision before I even knew I'd made it.
"Sure, just wait over there." I smiled to soften how quickly I was speaking, and the fact that I was pointing to a spot out of the way. The place was busy and no one was doing anything but paying attention to the task in front of them. I grabbed two large to-go containers and filled them with hot soup, then added some extra bags of the flat bread we serve with it, a couple of plastic spoons, whipped the whole thing into a bag, crossed to where they were and handed it off to them. Again with a smile, to soften it, I said, "My boss wouldn't be too happy with..."
"Thank you, and no problem, we're gone." The man said, with no rancor.
I would have watched them leave but I was too busy -- yet as I worked I thought about how hot soup would feel in a cold, empty belly, and was as warmed by the idea as I hoped they were from their dinner.
A little while later my boss asked me what the couple had wanted. I thought she'd forget about them. Without missing a beat I said, "Oh, they just had a question about having a fundraiser here for shelter dogs or something. I told them to contact corporate through the website." The lie was as easy as breathing -- but then, they always were.
"Oh, okay."
I can eat there for free, so it's not exactly stealing. But start to finish it wasn't rigorous honesty, either.
Don't know quite what made me do it -- how I made the decision in a flash like that, but I can tell you I'd probably do it again, if it could be done as quietly as that was.
God knows I've "run into some trouble" in life -- and so have many of the people who are so dear to me I would be lost without them.
Sometimes you don't ask a lot of questions, or evaluate need, or suitability, or anything else.
Sometimes you just help.
And every time I do, I feel the richer for it.
I've been away at an overseas funeral. It's good to be back...
Glad to see you using your resources for good.
I was raised always to tell the truth, no matter what. That the principle was more important than the relationship. I happen to agree with your way. love, G
Posted by: Guinevere | February 10, 2011 at 03:51 AM
I would have told the truth and offered to pay for the food that I gave them, if it were a problem. I have bought quite a few meals for people who asked for food. Somehow I don't think that your boss would have flipped out at what you did. I am glad that you helped them out.
Posted by: Syd | February 10, 2011 at 05:10 AM
Not diggin' the lie, Mr. SP... regardless of the circumstances. Just my opinion.
Posted by: Lori | February 10, 2011 at 07:11 AM
I'm with Lori, not diggin' the lie. No matter the intention - any lie is the top of a very slippery slope. Just my opinion -Regardless of the cost of an employee's meals, it is stealing to give away without permission or paying for it and then to lie about it just isn't right. This post surprised me. Very much.
Posted by: Joy | February 10, 2011 at 07:20 AM
oh no! Justification!!!
Posted by: Smiley | February 10, 2011 at 07:47 AM
Humility?
Look what I did!
And I LIED about it too.
So easy to see that even the best of us (that means You, MR SP.) sometimes get it wrong. Thanks for sharing.
Posted by: Annie Mouse | February 10, 2011 at 07:58 AM
Once I gave a scarf I was wearing to a friend after she complimented it. It was a color I rarely wore but she frequently wore.
It was a spirit thing: it just happened before I even had a chance to notice.
I think we're on the right path if we do that sometimes. (Not never, but not every day, all the time, either.)
I remind myself of that every 6 weeks or so when I wear that color and don't have that scarf to go with it anymore.
Posted by: Jayne Dough | February 10, 2011 at 09:31 AM
Don't know you. First time here. But I say, "Good for you!". Jesus said, whatever you do for them, you are doing for Me. Good for you!
Posted by: Sharon | February 10, 2011 at 09:40 AM
"Sometimes..." I think maybe you used up your sometimes. Only you, God... and maybe your sponsor know if you can cover it with Step Ten?
BTW - as a former restaurant proprietor, I would have done the same thing.
Posted by: Ivan Toblog | February 10, 2011 at 02:49 PM
Oh, it's not for me to say what you did was wrong. I just wouldn't say it was right.
Posted by: Ivan Toblog | February 10, 2011 at 02:52 PM
If you ever spent some time with me you'd laugh at the "eyebrow." My sponsees shake their heads, groan, laugh, and react in various ways to it (not always happy ways) so I've really tried to control this part of my anatomy (with varying degrees of success)!
But as I read this post I couldn't hdelp but grin -- and I felt the telltale uncontrollable twitch above my left eye.
Next I read the comments, and the grin grew into a smile. The smile of recognition.
I try not to read between the lines too much these days (my sponsor used to encourage me to read the black letters on the page, not the white spaces), but I sensed you might not be completely comfortable with your own thinking.
I'm not so sure I would have done any differently if I was in your shoes, but I would definitely have to ask myself what motivated me to lie in the first place.
"The answers will come if [my] own house is in order..."
Posted by: Bobby D. | February 11, 2011 at 04:58 AM
Bobby D:
As I read your reply, I sat here grinning thinking of my own sponsors version of the eyebrow. She quietly "Hmmmmmm's" me.
And I LOVE "Read the black letters on the page, not the white spaces. I have a sneaking suspicion I will be borrowing that phrase to use with my own sponsees. Thank you.
Posted by: Julie. B | February 11, 2011 at 07:12 AM
Mr. SponsorPants, I'm one of your biggest fans, but I'm not diggin' the lie either. Do I think giving them the food was the right thing to do? Absolutely. Was lying about it the right thing to do? I'm remembering the saying "You're only as sick as your secrets." Now you're keeping a secret from your boss. You think your boss might be upset if she/he found out you were giving away the restaurant's food. I think you're right, your boss probably would be upset. So you need to pay for the food. Would you only help this couple out if you could steal the food, but not if you had to give $5-10 out of your pocket to do it? Put the money in the till, Mr. SponsorPants.
Posted by: MB | February 14, 2011 at 02:05 PM
:) I have done the same thing.
Rigorous honesty is difficult when you are facing corporate ideals and also facing fears. The fear of what I think someone is/will be thinking.
My own head comes up with a few fun ones, right off the bat...
They'll think homeless people have a network and their restaurant will be over run, they'll reprimand me for giving away their product, they'll...
the committee keeps very busy sometimes. :oP
We lie even when the truth would serve us better (Ed M. taught me that, my own sponsor echos it all the time). No ability to stop myself, only the ability to humble myself to God and my fellow man after I realize the truth.
How great is it that God doesn't allow you to turn away someone who is truly hungry and humble enough to say so even though it pains them to humble themselves that much, in life the pain of the ache inside outweighing the outer humility that it takes to submit always has to come first for me. To ask to be given (forgiven) food, warmth, love, kindness. That's what this whole God thing reflects right?
God sure is gigantic, sends those people to just the right person in just the right circumstance has no power to do anything different "no one who asks for bread will receive a stone" and has the ability to look back and see the whole event from a 'greater' point of view and see that God does not give bad stuff to the kids who humble themselves and ask for give.
YAY GOD!
Posted by: Jessie | February 16, 2011 at 09:50 AM