Me: God?
GOD: Yes, Mr. SponsorPants?
Me: I wanted to run something by you. Bit of a question, bit of a suggestion.
GOD: 'kay. Shoot.
Me: You may have noticed that I seem to be having my own hypocrisy in that one sensitive area I've been talking to You about pretty much just thrown in my face lately.
GOD: I notice everything. You know that whole "eye on the sparrow" thing in the Bible? Maybe that's what it means -- and you should take comfort from it.
Me: Maybe? What's with the maybe? You're God -- either You are or You aren't, and if You are, then I would think -- I would hope -- You're pretty sure of things. Especially Bible-y things.
GOD: Either I am or I am not. I do not need to decide that, you do. Though in this case either I'm a somewhat trite and perhaps pretentious literary convention that you're using ... or I'm really God, using the literary convention to try and answer you. The problem is not with My sending, usually. The problem tends to be with your receiving.
Me: You finished? My thinking can be circular enough without that God-speaking-through-a-construct-that-appears-to-be-nothing-more-than-convention-but-may-conceal-Truth hall of mirrors thing.
GOD: You're driving. I'm just trying to get through.
Me: Ok, ok, okay. Anyway, this whole having my own hypocrisy thrown in my face thing ...
GOD: Don't call yourself a hypocrite. You aren't that. Well, at least not in this case ... but that other thing you were praying about ...
Me: Okay! Ok. Fine. Then what is going on?
GOD: Think of it as ... having your illusions ... no, wait, your self-imposed illusions, shown for the falsehoods they are. Think of it as finally seeing a few things more clearly. Think of it as letting go of some really, really, really old ideas.
Me: Right. But ... You know, does it have to be so ... so ... in my face? Couldn't you work through some of my insights? Some of my assets? Some of my strengths, to show me this?
GOD: Work through your assets, rather than your defects? First off, perhaps I do, more than you realize (sending? receiving? hello?) -- but also, work through your strengths and assets and insights, Mr. SponsorPants? Now where's the fun in that?
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