Three deep breaths -- I mean really deep -- is all it takes. Three deep breaths can change everything.
If you do enough inventories (like... a couple hundred at least) eventually you develop a wonderful kind of natural ability to look at a situation and go, "You know what? That's not my stuff. This bit right here? That's all me. But most of this is not my stuff." It's incredibly freeing.
In the absolute best sense of the word, people can really surprise you.