We say -- I hear -- "all we have is today" so often that it loses its power.
It's important to regularly remind myself that what I have is "a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of my spiritual program."
Or, to put it another way...
You can't ski on last year's snow.
It's what I do today which helps me stay physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually sober today.
Sure, sure, the last thirty days of my sobriety are indeed substantively different than the very first thirty days of my sobriety... but what I did in those first thirty days really only worked to keep me sober in those first thirty days.
Today is what I have.
Today is what I must work with.
Today's action is what keeps me sober.
I drank or used drugs pretty much every day to cope with life.
So now I do AA pretty much every day to cope with life.
If someone pushes (and pushes and pushes) when you politely decline something (anything) feel free to use this line.
For the people pleasers in the room, sometimes it's hard to come up with something to say in the moment when you're under pressure to hold the line -- I suggest having a couple of "rehearsed" responses ready to fall back on.
I suspect a gentle delivery is as effective a way to draw your boundary as a more vehement line reading, but do what's right for you in the moment.
Accept your fear of being judged and open your mouth anyway.
I had to open my mouth in AA meetings regardless of how sure I was that everyone would think I was stupid or vain or too sick or not sick enough or good or bad or whatever I was that I shouldn't be or wasn't that I should be. I had to open my mouth and share in AA meetings to smash through my fear of judgment. And I had to do it more than once for it to be thoroughly smashed.
Because the medicine in a meeting is transmitted through the process of identification.
If I don't share, I am potentially withholding help from someone else.
It is not vain to consider the idea that what you share might help someone. It is accepting that you don't know everything. (Stop playing God!)
I share in meetings because that is one key way to "carry the message to other alcoholics." In other words, that is one key way I can practice the 12th Step.
I need meetings because it is in an AA meeting I can take my turn carrying the message.
I need meetings because it is in an AA meeting I might help someone else -- even if they never tell me or I never know it, I participate in case I might.