Post #1000

 

 

 

 

And so we come to the 1000th post here at Mr. SponsorPants.

Some quite short -- no more than a brief thought with maybe an image -- others perhaps overlong for the blog format -- but with only a handful of missed days Mr. SponsorPants has been a surprising constant -- and comfort -- for me over the last few years.

 

Frankly, I've struggled terribly in my life with procrastination.  I do not think of myself as a particularly disciplined person.  (When I first encountered the line in the AA literature "We alcoholics are undisciplined... so we let God discipline us in the way we have just outlined..." I am quite sure I winced).

Has writing Mr. SP taught me discipline?  I think it would be closer to the truth to say it has shown me that I am much more disciplined than I give myself credit for.  There's plenty of evidence to suggest that an alcoholic's powers of self-assessment are not great, so it's no surprise that I was surprised at my sticking to it.  It was important to me to do that.

I take the service aspect of it seriously -- as I do the anonymity of it, too.  And, as with everything in my life directly informed by AA's commitment to service, it's been both easier and harder than I thought, and I have gotten things from it I could never have imagined -- not the least of which is a feeling of being a part of something much bigger than myself.  That knowledge was always there regarding AA, but the experience of hearing from people in recovery from all over the world has been a profound and humbling thing -- a part of the blogging experience that I really didn't think about when I started.

And as with anything to do with sponsorship in general, I have gotten so much more than I've given -- which of course is the great spiritual paradox of service:  Once you start sharing -- your heart, your time, your attention, your experience -- what comes back to you is always immeasurably greater than whatever you think you gave, however much that might be.

So with that I wanted to say thank you.  For the emails, the comments, the little blips on the TypePad Overview thingy that tells me someone, somewhere, clicked in for a bit.

Someday I'll make the time to pull some of this blog into a more organized and coherent format and maybe make a little book out of it.  You can self publish so easily now.  And if that impulse is fueled equally by a desire to continue to be of service and maybe some ego -- well, that certainly wouldn't be the first time such a heady mix was the gas in my car. 

Tomorrow will be, without fanfare, #1001.  I'll keep plugging away.  I'm too old an AA dog to say "...for another 1000 posts..."  One Day at a Time refers to blogging, too I think. 

Sometimes I sit down to write and I feel empty -- just nothing there -- so I wait.  And eventually something comes -- even if sometimes it is just one short sentiment.  I turn it over and put it down and figure that maybe someone somewhere needed to read just that thing just at that moment; so whatever it is it's the right thing to write, regardless of how inspired -- or "un" -- I may feel.  Ultimately it is my privilege to share in any way -- anywhere and in any fashion -- what was so freely given to me. 

There is a passage at the very end of 'Bill's Story' in The Big Book which never fails to choke me up:

"Most of us feel we need look no further for Utopia.  We have it with us right here and now.  Each day my friend's simple talk in our kitchen multiplies itself in a widening circle of peace on earth and good will to men."

My heart is full of gratitude at being part of that ever widening circle with all of you...

Love,

Mr. SponsorPants

Comments

[Pam]

Your blog has been such a blessing to me darlin'.

[dAAve]

I say THANK YOU for these first 1000 posts. I've read most of them and shared a few of them with others.
I feel like I almost know you. I think you're an alcoholic.
Just like me.

[bob]

Ive read about 500 entries. The wit the sense of irony, sometimes your very real pain have opened me up when I was closing down. The first thing on today's gratitude list is mr SP.

[helenprev]

And this is where I jump out of lurkdom to say I've been reading your blog for ages and it has helped me so much. Your words have been a huge inspiration to me and got my head out of my own backside on many, many occasions. I'm delighted to hear there will be a post #1001 coming up too!

Thank you.

[Luna]

So many times you blog was just what I need to save me from my self made misery. The word Grateful doesn't seem to cover it.

Well then! Happy 1000, Mr. SP! Love you! xxoo

[Syd]

Thank you for all 1000 of your posts. I read you each day, not often commenting. I get a good message though with each post. I have shared your posts with others. Glad that you are here.

[Ms. Sponsorpanties]

Wow. 1000. I wasn't counting, but I do count on this blog m-f. I have laughed and cried; saw myself and saw others; and saw the "woman God intended me to be" played out in these lines. I have shared with others and quoted you often (always with credit!). "Glad you're here" I think I will Keep coming back!

[Gay-in-AA]

Wow I never knew there was a Ms. Sponsorpanties!

Thanks so much for doing this blog. It has become such an important part of my morning quiet time and routine (just like a big cup of coffee). You have answered two of my questions too (thanks). On the 14th I'll be celebrating one year back. I actually went a while before finding a permanent sponsor. You helped fill the gap and gave me lots of stuff to help me grow. While I could go on and on about how much this blog has helped me, I'll just say that we never know what our words will do for someone. Rest assured that you are a big part of the reason that I am sober today.

Love and respect.

John S

[Orbus]

You have brought so much to my life by sharing your life. I'm sure your family is very proud. Like others, MrSP is the first thing I read every morning. Your wit, warmth and wisdom is a perfect way to start the day. I'm first in line to read your book. Good luck with that if that is the path you take. Thank you for sharing.

Love and respect.
orbus

[Larry G.]

I've been reading your blog for close to a year now. I read it every day as a part of my morning. You speak my language and have helped me grow. I share your thoughts with others and it has helped them more than you will ever know. Keep doing what you are doing, and I will keep reading and passing it along. Thanks!

[Daisy Anon]

Congratulations Mr SP. I have read every one of your posts and I have shared much of your wisdom with others, albeit sometimes in a disguised form!

(Not plagiarising I mean, just not identifying it as an AA source)

You have been such a source of strength for me, a real virtual sponsor.

[Peggy]

I wrote you an email about 2 years ago when I began me recovery path and you wrote back. That short note of encouragement meant a lot. Thanks. I love reading your pithy as well as very long posts and everything in between. You make me laugh out loud often. Thanks for your honest sharing.

[Ivan Toblog]

When I started reading this I thought, "Oh $#!+, he's gonna pack it in."
I'm happy that's not the case

[Dayna]

Mr. Sponsopants, I am sober now 549 days. everyday
I get up early, pray, get centered and ready for
My day. I read the news and your blog. EVERYDAY( except weekends, I'm bummed no weekends said the selfish Alcoholic. ;)).
I am grateful for so many things and your blog is one of them. Service to others is indeed beautiful, thank you for yours.

[Jeff]

Thank you Mr. SP! I too read just about everyday. And I'm honored and comforted to be connected to you! Thank you for mentioning your issue with self-discipline. It is maybe the number one thing I think I struggle with too. At least, everyday for the past 3 years and 4.5 months God has gently disciplined me to stay sobriety. And for that, I am profoundly grateful!

[Suzie Z.]

I read your posts everyday without fail and have everyday for over a year now. You have been an encouragement and blessing to me. I will have 2 years of sobriety in November. This is the longest amount of sobriety I have had since I started drinking & drugging when I was 12 and I am 49 now. That is a miracle that God has worked through people just like you. Bless you for your service to inspire and help addicts and alcoholics like me everywhere.

[carol f]

You scared me, Mr. SP. I thought you were signing off. Sounded like you were but then maybe you changed your mind midstream or maybe you were just creating a little literary tension. Thanks for going on. Thank you thank you for your service. My sponsor doesn't have internet so I often read your posts to her...it's like being in a sponsor sandwich. A thousand thanks.

[Mrs D]

You are awesome and so helpful. I love the tone of your words and the personality that comes through. You have been very helpful to me, still in the early days of recovery. Kia Kaha from New Zealand (that means stay strong xxx)

[TAAAF]

I read you every morning with my first coffee of the day, and no matter your mood or state of mind, your love for AA is one strong constant. Just last night I once again recommended your blog to another sponsee. You're a 12-Step resource, Mr SP, and I'm so grateful for your service in this blog.

[Elle]

THANK YOU so much for all the wisdom, humor and grace that is found in this blog. I read it everyday and can't tell you how much it has helped me. I'm EXTREMELY relieved that you intend to continue.

[divalolo]

Dear Mr SP,
Happy 1000th post!

Thank you for your service. Thank you for sharing yourself openly, generously. Thank you for sticking with it.

[John W.]

Thanks Mister Sponsorpants for all your twelfth step work. You give me much to think about and I often pass it on to my sponsees. Congratulations on your milestone.

[Tricia C]

Thank you for your time, commitment, honesty and humility.

[Mary]

Thank you for all of it. Take care

[Debbie G]

I found you shortly after the death of my husband - which was coincidentally, 1000 days ago this week. I look forward to reading every post and am so grateful for all of them - the ones that make me laugh out loud, the ones that make me think and especially the ones that make me go "Uh, oh, me too!" HP has used you more than once to get my attention. :-) You have impacted my life in a positive way, during what was a very dark time. And the good news is you have stayed sober and I have stayed sober and service work works! :-) Thanks so much for being here and for for all you do.

[Susan]

What they said- You've hit me between the eyes more than once! Thank you for your time and experience-

[Cyndi]

I'm a new reader, and I'm an AlAnon...and I always get something from your posts to apply to my own recovery. There is much to learn from the commenters as well. It's like the greatest Open AA meeting...I'm glad I landed here when I did. We get what we need when we need it.

Thanks for your service!

[Janet]

Beautiful post, quiet resounding. Through expression there is a sort of exhaling that another breathes in and uses.

I was asked to be a sponsor today. I'm in Al-anon 3.5 years now (alcoholic parent/sibling in the past), this is the first time someone has asked and I went to reading/seeking this evening, we're meeting for coffee tomorrow to discuss the possible start. I am very grateful to come across your blog once more - and to find your share, which in turn feels like a little blessing.

I hope your week is wonderful!

[lulu]

Many, many thanks Mr. SP. I don't even remember when I started reading you. But there have been days when you have given me a little something that keeps me going and I thank you for that. And for giving me a place on the web that lets me know that I am not alone.

[Eliza]

I just found your blog today while googling Step 10--and have read a dozen or so varied entries. I quickly moved from "Who is this guy?" to "Thanks, HP--I needed this." I look forward to reading it all--and think you could surely put it into a book. Best wishes.