All day today I watched people "hear" a tone in someone's answer to them which, to my ear, really and truly wasn't there. It struck me what poor communicators humans seem to be. How "ready to be wronged" so many of us are. How people often create a conflict that doesn't exist by believing they are already in conflict with someone. In the Big Book, around the discussion of the 4th Step, it talks about how "we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate, seemingly without provocation." Alcoholics most definitely aren't the only ones who do this. But we sure are good at it.
It's not that "mean people suck" as the bumper sticker puts it. It's that "mean people are sick." Either way, they're no fun to deal with. But the latter can help me remember it's not about me. And maybe reach for some compassion as well. (Bit of a reach, some days. Bit of a reach.)
I am much happier when I stop thinking about who I'm supposed to be and just be.
And again, because it never gets old: If I don't drink or use or kill myself by the time my head hits the pillow at night I win. And the rest of this shit will just have to work itself out tomorrow.