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January 25, 2011


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As I was reading this, I was thinking, "Mr. Sponsorpants is dead on as usual." Then as I began to write a comment, I had another more humbling thought, "I AGREE with what Mr. Sponsorpants wrote." I'm currently working on my right/wrong thinking. I admit I gravitate more towards those I "agree" with, but I'm hoping to broaden my mind to accept others' opinions as their truth. It may help me be more tolerant of those who don't do things right -- I mean, do things diffently. :-)

Jeri  Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

The comment "Never say NO to an AA request" brought back a memory.... A sponsor once "requested" that her sponsees move her from one house to another....being new, no one thought that was wrong....anyway we live and we learn. And let's face it Some are sicker than others.


Your response to speaking at AA made good sense. I have always been one to look around the room while speaking trying to make my story fit with what I think others want/need to hear. I really want to sound good and hope they think I've really gotten 'it'. That comment may be a lie. Problem is I don't know the Truth when I'm busy with what people think.
I walk out of the room feeling like I have helped no one. Everyone, ok not everyone, is thinking that I'm an idiot, especially me.
The solution is my Truth.
G-d Help.

John Musgrove

The only caveat I would add to the 'never say no' rule is that I have asked my sponsor for guidance on some of the requests. While I was ready to chair a meeting in the first two months, I was not ready to commit to opening the meeting every week. It turned out the group had a 'find a replacement' rule for service positions and some people would ask anyone who might say yes.

Omaha Rick

With all respect to MSP, let me shade the advice that sharing at a speaker meeting should "leave room for God" or to "speak from the heart." While I agree that it shouldn't be written word-for-word like the State of the Union, I also find that "speaking from the heart" and "talking out your ass" are not too far removed from each other, and "planned sponteneity as a vehicle for Truth" can often result in "rambling, ego-centric, laugh-seeking, uninformative bore."

I don't understand MSP to advocate that we don't prepare; I merely suggest that respect for the group suggests thinking - ahead of time - about what is relevant to the listener, what would give it some coherence, etc.

Balance is the key - balance between thoughtful preparation and truth.

Love the blog, sir.

Bobby D.

Grat job my friend. You covered this topic well. I've found it helpful to find a quiet spot to close my eyes and ask God to connect me to my heart. Because if I speak from "my head" then your head can ignore it, but if I speak from my heart then it will cut straight through to your heart and there will be nothing you can do about it!

Reminds me of the first time I spoke. I was a nervous wreck, so after the meeting I asked my sponsor how I did. Before he could answer I told him I couldn't remember a thing I'd said!

"That's good!" he said with a smile. "You must have told the truth, because you only have to remember your lies!"

Then he said, "But Bobby, does itmake any sense to describe the most wonderful things that have ever happened to you with words that describe things that float down the sewer and go on in a whorehouse?"

I hung my head. And I've never used coarse language again to carry this beautiful message. My homegroup in Massachusetts reminds everyone that this is an open meeting, and that first impressions are lasting impressions. Then they request that those who speak please refrain from using profanity from the podium.

What an honor it is to be asked to speak.

Shelley T.

I will be sharing my story tonight. I found Mr. SponsorPant's suggestions encouraging and now have a plan of attack on my war with stagefright: stop worrying and start praying! I was going to try to plan out what to say but have decided instead to speak honestly "from the heart".

Joe R.

I am speaking for the first time today and I found this enormously helpful. Thank you so much.


I am sharing tonight to recieve my 1 year medalion. I would like to add that speaking to a group has helped me more than anything. And you can always tell a story. People love to listen to a story and use their imagination


Hi everyone! Thanks for all of your comments. I am speaking for the first time tonight and I was nervous but my sponsor suggested to give it to God and to stop trinG to run everything. I can't, he can, I think I'll let him.

Dave Duff

Hello. I spoke for the first time 2 weeks ago. My friends and sponsor said it went well. I was asked to speak again tomorrow 5 miles away. I know a lot of the same people will be there. My story is my story but how can I stop from boring them ?

Erica J

I'll be speaking for the first time less than a week after my 2 year soberversary. This article was very helpful and funny. Thank you!

Glenn E

Thank you! I am still very much a newbie with only 8 months in my first run with the program. I was asked to speak at a meeting tomorrow night. Your advice really put me at ease.

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