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November 08, 2010

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sevenup

I have found it helpful to book a hotel room when visiting my family, rather than stay with them. Knowing that I have a quiet safe place to go to at any time - and I can just say I'm fatigued or not feeling well, and break away and come back refreshed and more serene the next day. And yes, I never discuss my recovery with my family. They know I'm different, and that I don't drink and that I go to meetings. And that's all they need to know. Great post - I'm in Canada though, and we had our Thanksgiving a month ago. It's not really a four day event up here though. ;)

Meribeth

Fantastic post. Since I don't have family, my get togethers for holidays are usually with other alcoholics or a quiet day at home. What really struck me is that, like so many other suggestions, this is something I need to do for myself on a daily basis. Even in the rooms, since my family is now a bunch of wonderful, funny, kind, loving drunks. Of course, there is always the Uncle Ralph or Aunt Gert that can create excitement....Thank you!!!

raemelyn

A holiday trip was scheduled but I kept running into roadblocks in planning it. It is not to be. I am okay with that, today. It is sad. It is unfortunate. It is what it is. Acceptance brings hope which bring faith which make the sadness go away. My experience.

♥namaste♥

Jeff

I was waiting for #18 as I was reading along. :). My recent experience with serious family stuff demonstrated to me that, bringing God along and keeping him very close to my heart and very present in my brain, made ALL the difference in the world!!! I was looking for God in everything and found him!! I am truly grateful for the twelve steps and the spiritual awakening I have received… I now often see a lot of life as a spiritual exeperience and without CMA and AA I couldn't live this way!
P.S.: thank you sooo much Mr. SP, you've taught me soooo much!!!

Jackie

We always hold a huge Thanksgiving dinner at our house. This year, with my seven months of sobriety, I still wanted to have the dinner and I didn't want to worry about whether or not I would have problems with having bottles of wine around. I don't think I would but I would rather be thinking about how much fun it is to be around people than taking a chance on thinking about wine all evening.
So, I sent everyone our annual invitation and said "one small difference will be that there will be no alcohol at this Thanksgiving. Isn't it funny that those of us who think too much about alcohol get to make the rules for those who think very little?".
That took a huge load off my mind and made it possible for me to just relax and look forward to the day.
Maybe next year I'll feel differently and if we were going to someone else's house I wouldn't presume to try to make rules but now I know I will be comfortable in my own home.

recovering jezebel

"10. Remember, it is possible to look like you're listening intently to someone while you are actually saying The Serenity Prayer over and over in your head."

I KNEW IT! Thank you, Mr. SP.

Nony Mouse

Mr Sponsor Pants - you are an answer from HP! (at least I hope you are) I got a call asking me to speak at an OA workshop... the topic? Surviving the holidays with abstinenece intact! Mind if I use your blog as a handout and jumping off point?

Mr. SponsorPants

Go for it, Nony, and have a great workshop!

Elizabeth

Thank you so much for this post. My sponsor taught me early on to have a buzz word that my husband and I understood meant I needed to leave wherever we were with no questions asked and immediately. It worked really well and probably saved my bacon at least on two occasions. He did not question me. We left.

Syd

Leaving the field (of battle) even for a short time does remarkable things. And to pause when agitated is one of my mantras. Thanks Mr. SP.

Bobby D.

I loved your list so much I copied it and sent it to all my new pigeons. They'll get a kick out of it, and I know it will help them.

#18 reminded me of a gem I heard some years ago: "If you're scared, then send God in first!"

Another winner post from a winner friend. Thank you for passing it along.

P.S. I can still see a few of the faces of those who passed along most of those suggestions to me many years ago. God bless them, wherever they are.

Moira

This post is so great, I've printed it out and given it to friends who were going home for the holidaze (hope that's okay!). It's wonderful. Thank you for writing it.

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